on friday night i went to this international dance night. (is that a good thing to call it?) there were dj's representing different countries playing music from around the world. I went with virginia and helena and jaime (who i hadn't seen in a while) and chris spin. wheni was out i had this awesome conversation with justin, the bartender at the talking head. he had met a few times, mostly when i was with jason or katherine, but never actually spoke. we got to talking about writing and the mobtown writers collective and i started to feel really guilty that i haven't been "working on my craft" as much as i should. then i got too drunk on cranberry and vodkas. Apparently talked shit on russell and proceeded to go to jason's apartment, try to make out but then threw continuously for twenty mins. when i woke up, i was so hung over that everything hurt ( for the majority of the day) i walked to the market in the morning and made breakfast in bed i fumbled through some french toast and fell asleep again until four pm.

in the end, i decided it was best for me to
a. write
b. not drink cranberry and vodkas

I had this writing teacher at Goucher, I think it might have been a fiction professor, but anyway, the point is that she believed that we should write these things called "morning pages" where you write three pages in a journal as part of your morning routine, like brushing your teeth or combing your hair (which i'm assuming other people do as ritual every single morning) Now, these morning pages are not supposed to be beautiful or poetic they are not supposed to have form or grace, but they are supposed to "sweep the algae from the pond" as it were. they are supposed to clear your head for the rest of the day so you can go on to be creative for the remainder of your waking hours. morning pages are a good place to make to do lists, to talk about drivel that you have been thinking about, because the idea is that all of those things we carry around in our heads keep us away from being open/able to work and write.

I have never been very good with blogs, as virginia, i'm sure can testify, i guess i feel burdened by them, i feel like i am supposed to be more thorough than i like to be, or more poetic than i feel like, so they become this monstrous task, instead of just what they should be.....a skimming of the pond.

Before:

After?:


so, as i am setting out to use this to skim the pond, i imagine that it won't be very interesting for you to read. i also imagine i don't have very many dedicated readers as i do not post very often. so, i guess it doesn't really matter. awesome.
okay.
phew.

the plan is, every morning at work, i get in at 8:30, for the most part i can get away without doing anything until at least nine...so this is my plan. .........maybe y'all should start a pool to see how long i will consistently do this (with one or two day exceptions) i give my self 6 days. (and the weekend doesn't count) okay maybe 10 days. i AM giving myself a lot of allowances, aren't i? Guess who doesn't have any will power! Oh, you knew. yep, me.